Any martial artist will tell you that the proper position when you suspect trouble or foul play of any kind is what is referred to as a T stance. If I were to push you with a fair amount of force while you are standing in a relaxed position, you would go down. However, if you assume a proper T stance by standing with your right and left knees slightly bent with the heel of your left foot pointing to the inside arch of your right foot so that they are perpendicular to each other (hence the T)…you will more than likely stay on your feet regardless of the force.

My friends, I am a Yankee Doodle Dandy, whose eyes have seen the glory of the American People! We have good reason to be cautiously optimistic about 2011. But we are players on the stage of time, in a play that has been written, produced, directed and choreographed by those who don’t share the same vision of who we are (that’s putting it nicely). And we’ve been delivering our lines and dancing our steps for so damn long now, it’s hard to separate ourselves from the playwright’s script!

Well I’ve got a new script for us! First of all, I am happy to say we will be playing ourselves! So the very first thing we need to do is shed the old character we’ve been playing for so long and settle right in to the nice cozy cottage of who we really are. Ah yes, there’s no place like home! This may require a little deprogramming though so repeat after me, I am not a mindless charity case that requires a social order and mortal director to keep me in my place. That’s very good, and convincing…see, much easier to be yourself…right! We’re not done though; I am the master of my own destiny, blessed among men by the grace of a most sacred charter of individual liberty and rights granted me by God above! That’s brilliant! You are a natural!! Now we’re getting somewhere! OK, so for this first scene, I want you to think and be the following; charitable heart, steel-firm resolve…charitable heart, steel-firm resolve.

                                                           Scene 1

America is our one and only daughter. And tonight is very special because it is our one and only daughter’s very first date! Now there’s a little plot twist here, but bear with me (Some of my friends on the left will love it!). Moms & Dads…we are all DADS tonight!

For that reason I was able to convince the Director and Prop Master to go along with the smaller chain saw…because when he comes to the door, both Dads need to be able to hold the saw upright at a 90 degree angle with one hand while pulling the start cord with the other.

Ok, so remember…a good solid Tea Stance everybody! Ready on the set? Oh, I almost forgot to tell you! The name of this very nervous young man…is 112^th Congress! An odd name for sure, but I understand he comes from a very good family!

I can hardly wait to write Scene 2! How about you?